Can we agree on an ban on the word "epic" in the following context: "Cousin, however, scored an epic goal.."? Let's look at the definition of "epic":

Pronunciation: \ˈe-pik\ Function: adjective Etymology: Latin epicus, from Greek epikos, from epos word, speech, poem — more at voice Date: 1589

1: of, relating to, or having the characteristics of an epic (an epic poem) 2 a: extending beyond the usual or ordinary especially in size or scope (his genius was epic — Times Literary Supplement)

Thus, a football season of normal duration or a regular goal cannot be described as "epic", dear BBC Scotland football commentator. And I'm going to hit you with a hardback copy of The Iliad next time you employ the word incorrectly. And that will cause you epic pain, believe me.