It's Almost That Time Of Year

Denmark is the oldest kingdom in Europe with a rich history of conquest, trade and culture. Regrettably, being lower even than the Netherlands, Denmark will be the first to disappear as the waters rise. The 5.5 million people of Denmark speak a language they themselves do not understand, with a numbering system that contradicts all laws of Math. Its consonant-free nature did not stop Denmark from winning the Eurovision in 1963; they won again (in English) in 2000.

Facts Capital: Copenhagen Economy: Dairy products, beer, cookies, exploiting Greenland's natural resources and labour force, wind turbines Famous landmarks: The Little Mermaid, Tivoli, Legoland, Birthe Kjær

I have found the essential guide to this year's Eurovision. The darlings at ESCnation has compiled a guide to every single competing nation (and Georgia). It is hysterically funny (and some bits are not safe for work - such as the description of Poland) even if you do not care a tuppence about Eurovision.

Speaking of which, I sat through a live-stream of the Swedish national final and sadly the best performance was a strange, beautiful version of last year's winner. I really didn't get the winning song, Malena's La Voix and, apart from a late 1990s-esque boyband and the ever discotastic Alcazar, didn't tap my feet at any stage. Hmph. Sweden, you disappoint me.

(And in case you are dying to know, Norway is emerging as the big favourite to win.)

IM IN UR WASTELAND

It is times like these that I wished I smoked. Tough decisions to make and it is (unsurprisingly) tough to make them. I knit to relax and (again, unsurprisingly) I have finished a hat within two days. So, let's distract myself with interesting links. It usually works..

+ Unusual Architecture does what it says on the tin. I rather like Poland's Crooked House and am in love with the Kansas City Public Library.

+ A Map of the Galaxy's Most-Travelled Space Port Stations. As someone points out in the comments: "A word of advice: do not use the restroom at the Eagle Nebula station. I know it means you'll just have to hold it for 30,000 years until you reach Carina, but trust me, you'll be glad you did."

+ A really interesting grid: Human Variation - The Height/Weight Photographic Grid. I'm particularly intrigued to see how I'd look if I followed my doctor's advice..

+ Libraries' surprising Special Collections.

+ And, finally, a soul-destroying link: The Waste Land .. LOLCat-style. I don't even find it funny, but if you are of a less serious disposition than me you might find some sort of enjoyment in "fonician in teh whirlpoolz,  spinny/ spinny fortunes’ wheel. / in teh fonician, ponder ur fate!" Grrr..

+ Finally, finally: foxes on trampolines. Just because.

You And Whose Army?

Yesterday I kicked someone off my Facebook friends list. I came home, checked FB quickly and noticed someone from my primary school days had joined a Danish-language group called "I'm not racist but be nice OR get out of my country". My stomach tensed as I checked the group description with its ten so-called commandments (including "Accept people can eat pork and not be disgusting" and "Pay your taxes - even if you own a cornershop or a takeaway"). The Danish flag featured heavily, of course.

So I sat there just before bedtime and I was .. not shocked nor surprised..  but, I guess, saddened that someone I once knew would think it a great idea to join such a group. And then I realised that I have no time whatsoever for this sort of sh*t, kicked my erstwhile classmate off my friends list and headed off to bed feeling slightly shell-shocked.

I feel I should be doing something more than just block someone on a silly social networking site (and reporting the group to the FB admins as violating their TOS. I do not think they'll care much), but what?

Things I Have Learned

In the past week I have learned that:

1. The majority of my friends here in the UK are either bloggers who knit or knitters who blog. I had a really nice birthday lunch the other day and counted just three non-knitters (although all three are bloggers). Interesting.
2. I really, really like edamame and it could very easily turn into an obsession (except my stomach aches today).
3. My taste in books has become somewhat predictable. I finished reading Andrew Crumey's Sputnik Caledonia and thought it "freaking amazing" (yes, I've lost my critical vocabulary). I searched the net for reviews and came across The Guardian's review. It thought the book read like a cross between Alasdair Gray's Lanark and Jonathan Coe's What a Carve Up!. Those two novels happen to be two of my absolute favourite contemporary novels.. whoopsie.
4. Sweden belongs to a parallel universe. How else can I account for the fact that I've met two Swedish women this past week - one of whom is me in another universe (she has long red hair; I don't) and the other a parallel universe version of my bestest friend back in Denmark (she has tattoos; bestest friend doesn't)? Very, very strange .. and fun.
5. The world is a scary place. This past week has seen big smackdown drama on everybody's favourite knitting forum and me wising up to the fact that Twilight fans of a certain age enjoy making felted wombs (and the wombs apparently sparkle when you open them up!). You get nutters everywhere - especially among amateur goldfish enthusiasts, I've reliably been told - but who would have thought crafters could be that .. well, special?
6. And who knew that foxes love playing on trampolines? I didn't but it makes life a little bit better.

I'm off to a hospital appointment this afternoon but hopefully I'll be able to join my knitting group tonight. I have yarn to show off and an almost completed cardigan (I swear: Forecast (rav link) has been the quickest project ever).

It's also nice to have ttime and energy to blog once more.

Monday Linkage

• Bow down to the master: How to Read 462 Books in One Year. I feel like such an underachiever.
• The Book Cover Archive. Exactly what it says on the tin.
• Reason #1 why I'm happy being a crafter: "An evening gown that has champagne taste on a beer budget. Cheap champagne, but champagne nonetheless."
• Reason #2 why I'm happy being a crafter: Steal This Sweater - "stop making scarves; start making trouble."
• Reason #3 why I'm happy being a crafter. I only have the collar to go on my grey jumper and I'm taking the easy option.
• The Axis of Awesome: 4 Chords (youtube link). "The song that proves that all you need to be a pop star is four simple chords." Yes, The Crowdies' "Fall At Your Feet", A-ha's "Take On Me" and, er, Banjo Patterson's "Waltzing Matilda" are all the same song.
• Inauguration Day from Space. "The world’s highest-res Earth-imaging satellite zooms in on President Obama "
• "Cooking doesn't get TAFFA than this!" Yes, it's the Gregg Garbbler (also known as the MasterChef Automated Quote Generator). Will only make sense if you watch BBC's MasterChef (Other Half is a devotee). "God, you've got some big flavours, boy!"
• I recently got invited to Spotify and since I'm on the wrong side of thirty, I immediately began catching up with New Music That Kids Today Like (gosh!). Fleet Foxes are really lovely, Vampire Weekend don't do it for me and Lady Gaga leaves me absolutely cold. I'm so old. Spotify also has a vast collection of 80s Swedish boybands and Russian folk songs. Ask me how I know. Anyhow, I have seven Spotify invites for anybody in the UK, Estonia or Sweden wanting one. Leave a comment (your mail addy won't be published as per usual and I'll mail it to you).

Have a lovely Monday, everybody!

When In Doubt, Knit.

It snowed this afternoon and we are said to get heavy snowfall tomorrow. I have been curled up inside finishing my first project in 2009 and also doing a stash-busting exercise with plenty of colours. Colours warm my soul - especially with snow outside. The first finished project in 2009 is this little cardigan which I've dubbed Presto Chango Monsta (literally "Quick Change Monster"). I have a nephew due in March and I thought he might like to snuggle up in a soft little top.

The Presto Chango pattern was an utter delight whilst my chosen yarn, Washed Haze, was splitty and showed up every tiny flaw (plus I'll never be a fan of cotton or cotton-blends). I chose to embroider a little monster rather than knit a lacy front.

The end result is rather nice even if my freehand embroidery is wonky.

I suspect that Presto Chango will become my go-to pattern for baby gifts. It's very easy to customise and is a joy to knit. I just need to find a less irritating yarn (still washable and still soft).

My stash-busting project is this shawl. I began it whilst watching In Bruges and it has grown enormously since then. It's a bog-standard triangular shawl (I have posted brief pattern notes on the Ravelry project page) knitted in Wendy Fusion with an edging done in Rowan Kidsilk Haze. It makes me smile, it's easy TV knitting and it uses up all those stray balls of wool I have lying about.

A non-knitting observation, finally.

I do not have many kind words to say about Facebook and privacy settings. However, I just found out that you can actually block specific people from finding you on Facebook (let alone try to friend you or view photos posted of you). I have now blocked my old stalker* from viewing anything related to me which gives me a nice, fuzzy feeling. Thank you, Facebook. It's a nice feature.

(* stalker in the "oh god, now the police is involved, I have to hand over evidence and I cannot sleep in my own home" sense, alas.)

PS. Our Christmas tree has been recycled and its removal from our home now means I have free access to my yarn stash again, oh happy days.