Swings & Roundabouts

This was supposed to be my first step into autumn knitting. "Grab some lovely yellow yarn (sure to brighten up the dreich days of Scotland) and whip up some quick wrist warmers". That was my plan last night and I felt quite pleased with myself when I found a very suitable pattern on Ravelry. Except I have now spent more time rewriting the pattern than I would have spent designing and writing my own pattern. Sometimes you get what you pay for with free patterns:

• spelling mistakes to the point of rendering the pattern incomprehensible
• using wrong terminology to explain specific actions (CB4/C4B clearly means something different to the designer than it does to me)
• Instructions that look like short row instructions - except there are no short rows in the pattern
• And if you follow the pattern you end up with a fingerless glove which looks very weird on my hand (the thumb goes where?)

Maybe I am the odd one as a handful of people have knitted these gloves and they all loooove the pattern? Or maybe they are best friends with the designer? I'm in a very cynical mood today. The lone glove is going to the frog pond to die and I am going to find a tried-and-tested pattern (at least 100 projects) for my autumn knitting.

Grumble.

But lovely, lovely things happen too. Look what landed on my doorstep yesterday!

Ms Mooncalf had run out of wool for a current project and I just happened to have ½ a ball of the right yarn in the right colour.

One swap later and I have the pincushion I so desperately need for my dress-making adventures - handmade and in my favourite colours! - and she even included some gorgeous coasters too. Bless her, Casa Bookish is not a household that uses coasters but I shall think of a way to put them to good use.

Thank you very much, dear swap partner!

Glazed

My good friends at The Life Craft are moving premises, and so they invited me along to a special Friday night of painting pottery in order to say a proper goodbye to their Great Western Road home. I had never painted any pottery before, but I actually had a really good time. I learned the hard way that it is difficult to paint straight lines on a curved surface but this little tea cup ended up just .. fine.

I'm trying not to be too hard on myself, actually - the lines are wonky and the design feels very token but I'm trying not to be too critical, m'kay? It is amazing how self-critical crafters can be.

The colours are exactly how I hoped they would turn out, at any rate. And funnily enough they are almost the exact colours of the dress I'm hoping to make this weekend.

A few links for you to peruse:

• Peter Oborne of the Daily Telegraph insists that the recent English riots should be seen in light of British society as a whole - and asserts that the moral decay of British society is as bad at the top as the bottom. Quite a brave column.
• Russell Brand(!) weighs in on the rioting with a punchy (and beautifully written) column. Well worth reading and not just for lines like "Then dopey ol' Boris came cycling back into the London clutter with his spun gold hair and his spun shit logic as it became apparent that the holiday was over." I do admire a well-turn sentence.
• Is the Glasgow accent being cockney-fied? I enjoyed watching the little film clip and remembered how I arrived here not understanding a word of the local dialect - and now I do.
• Sad Etsy Dogs. Exactly what it says on the tin. My favourite is this one which isn't all that sad. My second favourite is definitely sad, though.
• It's not all about humiliated small dogs. Knitting and crochet do good things too.. like making toys for the Battersea Dog & Cat Rescue centres. Aww.. though I do feel cheated by the photos that do not feature a single dog.

I Saw the Best Minds of the Rebellion Eaten by Sarlacc...

Who on earth likes both Star Wars and 20thC poetry? ME! And this is one of the funniest things I have seen on the internet this week:

so much depends upon

a scarred young jedi

stitched with cyber netics

beneath the black helmet

Or how about

For I have ordered them, ordered them all— Have crewed the evenings, mornings, afternoons, I have crewed my life with storm-troop goons; I know clones dying with a dying fall, And Alderaan, beneath the Death Star’s doom The soundless, vacuum-muted boom.

Or indeed

There died Hunter Fugitive. And the best of them, among them For old Boba gone in the teeth For a botched storyline.

There is just a smattering of Shakespeare in the linked post, which is fine by me, but I do think this cries out for some rock'n'roll 17th C poetry. A bit of Andrew Marvell - but sadly filking is beyond my abilities. I can but dream.

Background Details

It's been that kind of morning.

"So, which textile degree did you do?"

"No textile degree, I'm afraid. I have a degree in English with a specialisation in print culture from a Danish university."

"Okaaaay, why did you move there to do your degree?"

"I'm .. Danish?"

".."

I posted this exchange on a certain social networking site and some good friends tried to reframe things for me.

Can't you just invent an explanation? "Well, I was really going to study in Rwanda, but then the plane crashed and ..."

"and after fighting of the packs of lions and the rabid wildebeests, I thought I'd..."

"... I thought I'd knit myself a fishing net so I could get some food. And then my clothes had got all tattered, so I knit myself some new ones, and that inspired me to go into designing."

"That's why most of my garnments are green. Jungle-inspiration."

Yeah, it has been that kind of morning: quite odd but very funny.

Hang on. Most of my days are quite odd but very funny. Hmm.

Response

Many of you have left thoughtful replies to my review of Jane Brocket's knitting book. I have also received a few mails and tweets. Thank you all. Some of you wondered I made no mention of "Brocket-gate" - i.e. the mainstream media and blogosphere response to Ms Brocket's The Gentle Art of Domesticity - and whether or not I was aware of it. Yes, I was aware of the response to The Gentle Art of Domesticity but I did not think this response particularly relevant to The Gentle Art of Knitting. I could write a long and boring paragraph about how I read books (I'm one of those girls who went to university and lost her intellectual innocence to literary theory) but suffice to say that I tend to focus on the book itself rather than any outrage surrounding its author.

And so I approached this new Jane Brocket book as I would any other knitting book: did I think it useful? did I find the patterns interesting? did it inspire me? did it teach me anything new? I hope I answered those questions in my review.

Some linkage: + Women of the Vortex. MARVELLOUS pictorial evidence of daring lady painters of a young 20th century. I find Vorticism endlessly exciting. I wish I could go to Tate Britain and shout about machines, speed and modernist epistemology. BLAST! + A Knitted Garden. This totally made my morning when I first saw it. + Modern day Hollywood has nothing on the stars of the Big Studios years. Clark Gable & the Scandal That Wasn't is an excellent read. + Speaking of entertaining reads, this review of "Rushed to The Altar" from Smart Bitches, Trashy Books had me howling with laughter. The review is definitely not for the faint-hearted and it is NSFW, but it is also hillarious. + It is a good thing I did not have my own webspace back in 1996, because I would definitely have set up an early prototype of My Daguerreotype Boyfriend. + Neil Patrick Harris' opening number at this year's Tony Awards = possibly the best 6 minutes of 2011 so far?

I have finished no less than three projects this week, so there will be plenty more knitting content over the next few days, but I'm also trying to work out a response to China Mieville's Embassytown which does not involve me muttering about Martian poetry. Cross your fingers hard.

Making Things

Crochet. I have been absolutely obsessed by crochet lately. Today I made this little bracelet out of scrap Rowan Denim. Pattern tomorrow. If you're a beginner crocheter, you will love how simple it is. Two things:

1) I love crocheting with cotton. In fact, I know nothing better than crocheting with a tightly-twisted mercerised cotton. Knitting with cotton tends to ruin my hands but crocheting is a different story all together.

2) I am an awfully tight crocheter. I have to go up at least one hook size (if not two) because my crocheting is uncomfortably tight and dense. In fact, you could probably use my crocheted fabric to cut bread unless I change hook size.

My very first garment ever was a self-designed crochet jumper made from my Mum's cotton scraps. It was yellow, orange, pink, lime green, and red. I made five granny squares and crocheted them together to form a strip right across my generous bust. (Hey, I was seventeen!) Then I crocheted stripes alongside the bottom edge making up the pattern as I went along. And a matching stripy square for the back. And another two stripy squares for the two sleeves. I whip-stitched everything together, of course, and wore the wonky cropped granny-squares-across-bust stripy jumper with pride.

Funnily enough the jumper got "lost" in the laundry one day.  Thanks Mum.

She never did manage to lose the trousers I made from my late uncle's kitchen curtain. These trousers would be have been on-trend this season had I not wore them until they fell apart (the fabric with its fish motifs might also have pegged me as being slightly weird). I am a bit tempted to sew a pair of wide-legged trousers, but I'll definitely give the crocheted granny-square/stripy jumper a miss.